Walking with Fear–A Journey of the Heart

Walking with Fear–A Journey of the Heart

As my heart surgery approached, I was often asked, Are you scared? The answer was yes! And believe me, I’ve worked deeply with that fear–sat with it, questioned it, and, in many ways, befriended it. In the end the fear softened and let go of its powerful grip. I'm not completely sure what happened but by sitting with it and moving through it a shift to place and with that i gained more energy. The calm spread through me and took up more space than the fear.   

Here are some thoughts: For much of my life, I believed fear was something to conquer. Feel the fear and do it anyway was my motto. And while that mindset carried me far, I now understand a softer, more sustainable way of moving through fear–one that doesn't fight against it, but instead walks with it, as if you are taming it, and in a way you are therefor conquering it but with more awareness, with kindness!

Can We Be Completely Fearless?

We often see fear as an obstacle, something to push past or eliminate. But is that really possible? And more importantly, is it necessary?

Fear has a purpose. It protects us, sharpens our instincts, and keeps us aware. Without it, we might take reckless risks or ignore important signals. But the question isn’t whether we should have fear–it’s what we do with it when it arises.

Can we learn to live with fear, rather than in fear?

I believe we can. And I believe the key lies in the heart.

Fear and the Ego

Fear and ego are deeply connected. The ego thrives on control, identity, and self-preservation. It fears uncertainty, vulnerability, and failure. It wants to keep us in the familiar, equating safety with what is known.

But ego isn’t the enemy, it’s simply a part of us that needs awareness. When we let fear dictate our choices, we stay small. When we recognize it for what it is, we create space. Space to respond instead of react. Space to trust instead of control. Space to live with an open heart instead of a guarded one.

How to Deal with Fear, A Gentle Approach

Instead of resisting fear, what if we met it with understanding and compassion? Here's how we can move through fear in a way that brings clarity, growth, and peace.

1. Acknowledge Fear Without Judgment

The first step is to recognize fear without trying to push it away. Instead of reacting impulsively, pause. Say to yourself, I see you, fear. This simple acknowledgment can shift how you experience it.

2. Get Curious: What Is Fear Trying to Tell You?

Fear carries a message. Is it warning you of real danger, or is it discomfort in the face of something new? Ask yourself:

• What exactly am I afraid of?
• Is this fear based on facts or assumptions?
• Is it pointing me toward growth?

By becoming curious, fear transforms from something paralysing into something insightful.

3. Shift From Resistance to Acceptance

Instead of fighting fear, try accepting it as part of the journey. Imagine fear as a cloud passing through the sky as you observe it, but you don’t have to become it.

4. Reframe Fear as a Doorway to Growth

Many of life’s most meaningful experiences are starting something new, making a big decision, stepping into the unknown and it comes with fear. But what if fear is not a stop sign but a signpost pointing toward expansion?

Try reframing:

• I’m scared of this challenge because this challenge is an opportunity for growth.
• What if I fail? To what if I learn something valuable?
• This is too uncertain to this is a chance to trust myself.

5. Regulate Your Body and Mind

Fear isn’t just in the mind–it’s also in the body. When fear takes over, try:

• Breathwork: Deep belly breathing to calm the nervous system.
• Movement: Yoga, walking, or stretching to release fear from the body.
• Meditation: Sitting in stillness to observe fear without reacting to it.

6. Take Aligned Action, Even With Fear

Fear often tells us to wait until we feel ready. But growth doesn’t come from waiting, it comes from moving forward despite fear. Take small steps. Action builds confidence and reduces fear’s hold over you.

7. Lead With Love, Not Fear

The biggest shift comes when we choose love over fear. Love trusts, expands, and opens us to possibility. When faced with fear, ask:

• Am I acting from fear or from love?
• What would love say in this moment?
• How can I soften into trust?

When we meet fear with love, it loses its power to control us. It becomes a companion on the journey–not the one leading the way.

Final Thoughts: Walking With Fear, Not In Fear

Fear doesn’t have to be the enemy. It’s a natural part of stepping into the unknown. The key is not to eliminate it, but to change our relationship with it–to listen, learn, and move forward anyway.

We may never be completely fearless. But we can choose to live with courage, with an open heart, and with trust in the path ahead. Fear walks beside us–but it doesn’t get to lead.

And so, with love in my heart and trust in my steps, I walk on.

I hope you do the same!

With Love,
Wenche